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Relationship anxiety: how to feel more secure with your partner

Relationship anxiety means worrying that your partner will leave you, even when things between you are good. Relationship anxiety is very common, and you can learn to feel more secure.

We make personalised affirmation tracks. You tell us what worries you about your relationship, and we write affirmations about that worry for you to listen to. Make a track about relationship anxiety.

Common signs of relationship anxiety include:

Psychologists call these habits anxious attachment, which means often worrying that a partner is losing interest and often needing to hear that everything is OK. Anxious attachment usually starts early in life, and anxious attachment can change over time.

Why relationship anxiety happens

Relationship anxiety usually comes from how you feel about yourself, rather than from anything your partner has done. If you don’t feel good enough for your partner, you’ll look for signs that they’re about to leave. You may worry even more when the relationship is going well, as you have more to lose.

Why asking your partner if everything is OK only helps for a while

Asking your partner if everything is OK makes you feel better for a short time. The worry that your partner will leave then comes back, and over time you ask more and more often. Feeling secure in yourself helps more, because you no longer need your partner’s answer to feel OK.

How a track helps

Hearing your affirmations every day can help you feel calmer and more confident, in yourself and in your relationship.

Create my relationship track

One off payment, no subscription. Setting up your track takes a few minutes.

More on this, if you want it. Tap a heading to open it.

Things you can do today

These ideas come from research on couples. Each idea is free and easy to try.

  • When your partner tells you some good news, show interest and ask your partner about the news.
  • Thank your partner for something specific, for example ‘thank you for cooking tonight’.
  • If you’ve been short with your partner, say sorry soon afterwards.
  • Spend 10 minutes a day doing something just for you.

When you order a track, you also get our relationships practice sheet with more ideas like these. Members get practice sheets for all 12 focus areas.

What you get

Your track has 20 affirmations. You choose how clearly you hear the affirmations, from spoken out loud to fully subliminal, and you choose the background sound. Your track arrives by email as a file you can keep.

Start your track here, or take the 2 minute inner voice quiz if you’d like help choosing a focus.

Membership gives you new tracks whenever you need them. Members also get a weekly affirmation and 5 minute resets for the moments you want to feel calmer.

I had never listened to subliminal tracks before and wow, I feel like I couldn’t do without them now. More confident, less anxious, sleeping much better.

Carly, UK · verified review on Trustpilot

We also have pages on racing thoughts at night and imposter syndrome at work.

Give a track as a gift

You can send someone their own affirmation track as a gift, and the gift arrives on the day you pick. You can choose everything yourself or let the person choose their own focus. Send a track as a gift.

When to speak to someone

Please speak to your GP or a therapist if relationship worries are affecting your daily life, or if you feel frightened in your relationship.

Free, any hour, if you need to talk to someone now:
UK and Ireland Samaritans, 116 123
United States Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, call or text 988
Anywhere else findahelpline.com lists the number for your country.

Feel more secure in yourself and your relationship

Your track is written about your situation, and you keep the file.

Create my track